Life's Headaches

Nothing good comes in the mail anymore. What does one receive via snail-mail other than bills and junk mail?

Eviction notices. Here begins a story.

The Doctor and I reported for duty July of last year. Our lease in New Jersey ended as of June. We closed up shop, packed our stuff and schlepped across the country. We even turned in our keys. No complaints, no worries, just the wistful good-byes that one gives when one is leaving a home forever.

Nine months after getting settled in Arizona , I received the snail-mail letter. It informed me that the landlord of my sub-let apartment hadn’t paid rent and that, as occupant, I was liable for the full amount of rent while I was living there. If I didn’t pay, I was going to get sued, evicted and hit up for attorney’s fees.

Immediately my head began to hurt.

My primary reaction to life’s inconveniences of this sort is to question why I have to do my job without making any mistakes, but others aren’t held to the same standard. If anyone at the landlord (who, for anonymity’s sake, I’ll call Shmess-Kay Shmroperties) had actually bothered to examine the apartment in question before sending out threatening letters, this wouldn’t have landed on me, giving me a headache.

But now it was too late for that. Shmess-Kay Shmroperties had sent me a letter. I had a piece of writing in my hand declaring that I was liable for rent I didn’t owe.

I called the building and spoke with a Shmess-Kay Shmroperties representative. I explained my situation. “Oh,” Bob explained, “you can ignore the letter then.”

Thanks for letting me off the hook there, Bob, but I’m afraid that’s not quite good enough. “I appreciate your agreeability, however, I’m still in possession of a piece of writing from you saying that I owe you money. I would appreciate a letter from you saying otherwise.”

The answer to that simple request was no. My headache grew.

My secondary reaction to life’s inconveniences of this sort is to wonder why, when mistakes do happen, I’m the only one who seems to be willing to take the necessary steps to correct them. Shmess-Kay Shmroperties screwed up. They inconvenienced me and gave me a headache. All I’m asking for is a little comfort that they recognize their error and send a piece of writing acknowledging that, so I don’t have to spend time or money in the future guarding my rights. Apparently, this was too much to ask of Shmess-Kay Shmroperties.

In the end, they sent me an email saying that no suits were going to be instituted against anyone who was not a current resident of the apartment, and that the letter was sent to me in error. It was the bare minimum I was willing to accept. But it left a bad taste in my mouth, like someone had broken a relationship with me via text message.

If Shmess-Kay Shmroperties screws up again and it actually costs me money this time, I’m going to be very upset. Shmess-Kay Shmroperties will then witness my tertiary reaction to life's inconveniences of this sort, namely sending the cause of my headache something via snail-mail.